not even a sign? a warning? did i not love you so!

first my brand new speakers screw up
then my line-ins;
music, became a rare resource.

my music player followed,my protective bubble
went missing; in to blank nothingness
alien abductions? maybe,
it had some UDOM in it


i had almost recovered, fixed up rca cables,
an oh-so-smug me was oh-so-happy


but the geek up there,
you know... the chief programmer,
decided that i hadn't had
enough woe to compensate
for all the happiness *snort* he's given me


so wonder of wonder
the mother of all boards
gave up on me.
she lies there, eerily blinking
yet, refusing to live
she went silently
without a sigh or a moan


my umbilical cord to the world i love,
and the hope chest of my existence
has failed, and oh lookie! it can be
"...either catastrophic, component, or ethereal."
and it me, who slowly slips;
a surreal virtual coma


---
and oh btw, there's new music,
with the right number of
dedications [you know who you are]
so yeah, enjoy all the music you guys
while i go jump off the balcony
:|


PS: related tags
fuck my life,
im giving up today,
traitor!im leaving you for another( the books)
dont look at me with those cheating l.e.d's
look what you've done to me! how can i ever ctrl+alt+delete ever again in my life!
:|

all of my love

In a flash of silver, he scored her yielding skin. It gave way, like it knew; 

like it welcomed the all too familiar intrusion, and the brutal caress insinuated recusant release.

she watched it, 

small, pulsating, a point object gloating at its own creation, and then another; throbbing beads, connecting to become a micro deluge.

he watched her,and the red reflected in the dark orbs. 

as he watched, the black cracked, myriad crimson rays radiated from its core. 

He swept his hands up and caught hers in a vice; an eerie sense of possession permeated his being. 

Reclusive bohemian eyes turned wild; the raw hunger evident in them; a portrait of obscure passion; as Life dripped down her fingers.

a whimper of pain,

her body vibrated; 

like it knew; like it welcomed the all too familiar intrusion,

eternity, was Now... and life,
forever.

...

on the dull metal, the congealed crimson was now just a repugnant scar. She turned away, her smile profane; depravity had the final dance. yet again, he had succumbed.

a shudder went down his soul

and he hated himself anew.

sweet life

happy is when,
seven hours later,
you still have
a million
things to say;


and when
a smile
is all it'll take;
to say it all,
for now.

*drum roll please*

Its not often that i get candid on my blog, 

yeah well, 

its not often that i say anything that anybody at all understands

and 

its not often that i wildly grin when im making a new post :D

So here's the deal

i'm happy 

:)

and frankly its about time!

so in honour of this joyous occasion, yada yada yada, let me present to you'll 

a song 

which, surprisingly, has me hooked

which is surprising, given the fact that, my kind of music, is very very different

(see playlist on left for more details)

hope it brings a smile home to you as well, if it doesn't then i hope it does so soon!

PS:

-to all those who've been reading me and been so very good to me i say, <3>

-to those who want to disown me based on this one,isolated, guilty pleasure song, i say, think again!

-to the ones who're thinking, and know, that im definitely evil, i say, even evil needs a little TLC from time to time ;)

-to those who come here and leave, oh so silently, i say, i know you're out there, show thyselves! or dont, actually, but please dont pretend like you don't know what's going ono_O

-to my lovelies who're thinking "sheesh so she's finally and utterly lost it!" i say

"everybody needs a little madness in their lives from time to time"

so anyway!

here it is

Movie:Get over it

Track: Dream of me 

  "because there's always a perfect song that'll perfectly say what you feel" 

Let me sleep
For when I sleep I dream that you're here
You're mine and all my fears are left behind
I float on air, the nightingale sings gentle lullabies
So let me close my eyes
And sleep, a chance to dream
So I can see the face I long to touch, to kiss
But only dreams can bring me this
so let the moon shine softly on the boy I long to see
And maybe when he dreams, he'll dream of me
I hide beneath the clouds 

and whisper to the evening stars
They tell me love is just a dream away, dream away
A dream away
So let the moon shine softly on the boy I long to see
And maybe when he dreams he'll dream of me
Oh dream of me

-

ta :)

For me.

Another one, yet again, for me.

She
is a book,
held shut
under the eyes
that seek to read her.

Touched
by the hands
that know only to write,
She
will reveal her pages,
colored blank.


--

Shamanth

and from before

the "rainbow"

the "painter"

blue dusk

though i know 

you'd want to,
steal the colour of the skies;

i would still,
frankly so,
gladly keep my Indigo.

enamel timekeeper

Dipping amber trains 

crimson, over green;

Lends ephemeral shine. 

leaves murky brown

in place of, vivid 

erstwhile-chartreuse.  

blue butterflies sleep, 

while pink moths resist; 

the call of the late black. 

I, hue less wait, stoic as ever, in gray 

twilight. prenominal light of the dawn

Pronunciation: \ˈbō-ˌgärt\; Function: transitive verb

[Hey you know, maybe, i need to consciously realise that i know, you know?] 

  (mmm yes, that would help)    

[yeah, if im aware, if i could feel it, if i could sense it every minute
i probably would love myself more
hey you know, maybe, i need to really love myself, to live, you know] 

  (mmm yeah, you... should.) 

[really thats what you think? wow, im feeling so happy right now, happy without being, you know]  

  (mmm you should be) 

[hey you know, i wish i could really love myself
it shouldn't be so difficult
girl
i mean
look at you
wow
and your words
wow
i wish i could do that
love myself
and be comfortable
you love yourself and you love your self
you know] 

  (mmm yeah,
  it's all alright
  really) 

[can i watch when you roll this time?
you're so beautiful
i want to cry]

   (mmm yeah... sure 

 easy now,
 breathe deep
 pass left,
 give dammit!
 you bitch.)

life spectrum

a single strand of light
falls broken.
on my hand, a million pieces.
and yet,
when i walk away,
its whole again.


the warmth i can sense,
it skims
so gently on my skin;
and yet,
when i draw away,
its cold again.

around me,
everything i see,
is real. or is it;

if its the light,
that makes it so?
tell me...
don't you know?

You wait, patiently. But...

 

 " 

and when i finish,
sifting through moon dust;

maybe i will;

know that there is 
nothing more, 
to find.  

and then maybe;
we can hold hands 
under starry skies.  

But 
would you want to,
then?

if i said,
that it was too soon. 

for the stars,
are lonely company; 

and that i,
killed the moon. 

                                 "